


Stories

by Kadma32



Series: Our Future [4]
Category: God's Own Country (2017)
Genre: Emotional Hurt/Comfort, Fluff, M/M, Past, Slice of Life
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-12-23
Updated: 2020-12-23
Packaged: 2021-03-11 01:41:50
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,701
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/28267056
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Kadma32/pseuds/Kadma32
Summary: Johnny and Gheorghe travel back after their trip to Romania and share a few more pieces of their lives with each other.
Relationships: Gheorghe Ionescu/Johnny Saxby
Series: Our Future [4]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/2045542
Comments: 8
Kudos: 44





	Stories

**Author's Note:**

> Please note that English is not my first language and this work in unbetaed. 
> 
> While work on the wedding and on the adoption chapters continues, I wanted to write a little, completely self-indulgent piece to explore a little more of the back stories of our favourite boys. 
> 
> The mentioned teddy might appear in later chapters. 
> 
> Do let me know what you think :) Again, this chapter is a little bit off pist perhaps, but I had fun writing it.

Johnny was not normally a patient man. He could do anger, his old friend, but patience was a new development. And yet, somehow, he was finding himself liking airport waiting areas. Maybe it was just because it was still new and sort of exciting, but it was quite interesting to see all those people around finding ways to pass the time, like the guy sitting in front of him who had put his book open right on his reclined head and was now sleeping, his open mouth poking out of the book. Further down, there was a couple with two young children who had finally quietened down after they were each given a sticker album and were now spending their time throwing around the back of the stickers like they were confetti. But at least the adults were having a moment of peace and…

They were two men. 

Maybe friends? Or brothers? No. Johnny told himself that he was being so stupid as he felt himself blush when he saw the two holding hands. He looked away, then back at them. Wait, Gheorghe had told him that same sex couple couldn't really adopt in Romania, so maybe one of them was from abroad and one was Romanian, like him and Gheorghe. Not that it really mattered where they were from, they could be both from abroad and just on holiday with their children, a cute girl with pigtails and a younger boy with a mop of curly hair.

Could I have that too? He thought. He shook his head and looked away. Not in a million years, he wasn't father material.

'You alright?' Gheorghe appeared suddenly with two hot cups of coffee, in the vain hope of helping them stay awake in the long journey ahead. 

'Yes' Johnny replied, shaking himself out of his maelstrom of thoughts as he grabbed the cup. Really, he would have preferred a beer or a cup of tea, but caffeine could help. 

They took out the big bag of snacks Iolanda and Mariana had given them, bigger even than Deidre's, almost as if it was a competition. Not that Johnny minded anyway, the food was great, and he was really going to miss the nice bread, he thought as he grabbed the first morsel of his sandwich. 

'I wanted to thank you, John' Gheorghe said, holding on to his unopen sandwich and keeping his eyes down to his hands. 

'Uh?' Johnny said, his mouth too full to say anything more coherent and respectable. 

‘For not having asked me not about Andrei and my father’ Gheorghe replied, finally lifting his gaze to look at him. Gheorghe was smiling his quiet smile, so everything was ok, and yet Johnny felt out of sorts. 

It hadn't been out of the goodness of his heart that he hadn't asked, because, damn it, he had wanted to ask him so badly. He had almost exploded with the need to demand further details and explanations when Gheorghe had finally agreed to bring him to his old farm during their mini trip. Obviously, they couldn't go in, Gheorghe had parked just outside, but Johnny could still imagine how beautiful that vast piece of land had been.

As he sat in the car next to Gheorghe, he burnt with the desire to ask how this Andrei guy had come to work shoulder to shoulder with Gheorghe. He had wanted to ask the confirmation of what Mariana had implied about the guy and Gheorghe. 

And the more he thought of it, the more his anger boiled under his skin. It had been such a generalised anger that he had struggled a lot to keep it in check: it was directed at Gheorghe’s parents for having had allowed this guy into their lives and hurt Gheorghe; it was directed at the guy himself for having behaved like a complete shit, with the disappearance and all; and, for a brief moment, it was directed at Gheorghe for having given a piece of his heart to someone who wasn’t him. 

But he had kept it in. At the risk of his own liver exploding in a puddle of bile, but he did it. 

And, for once, it proved to be the right choice.

Before Johnny could finally say something, Gheorghe continued:

‘He was the son of a couple of friends of my parents. They were doing quite well for themselves, so it was decided that Andrei could come and work with us to earn some extra pocket money’ Johnny felt his heart rate starting to quicken. Now that Gheorghe was spontaneously offering what he had wanted to hear since Iolanda showed him those pictures, he wasn’t sure he wanted to hear it anymore. 

Did he really want to hear about the heart of his soon to be husband being broken by the biggest idiot in the world?

‘At first I didn’t trust him. He was all smiles and jokes, which I wasn't really used to. In a guy anyway’

Yes, Johnny could imagine that with Mariana and Iolanda there would have been enough laughter in the house. But maybe the father wasn’t the type. There was only one picture of the guy in the photo album and when Iolanda had showed it to him, Johnny had had to double take. He looked like a Gheorghe look alike, just with a few more wrinkles and a few grey hairs here and there. In the picture, his expression was stern, so serious that Johnny had felt a cold chill go down his spine. Well, if he had been Gheorghe’s male role model, he could understand why Gheorghe didn’t trust a joker type of guy. 

Johnny didn’t like those much either. 

‘But, well, slowly, that optimism started to rub off me. He had so many plans for the future, he made it look so shiny and interesting. And to give him his due, he was kind till’ 

‘What due does a guy who left you out in the cold deserve?’ Johnny hissed, interrupting him. That was enough, one can keep the anger deep down but, sometimes, it is just too much. And god it felt good. Johnny was certain that if Andrei had magically appeared in front of him in that very moment, he would have punched him right in the face. 

Gheorghe moved to take Johnny’s hand, but Johnny moved further away, almost knocking down the cup of coffee he had placed on the floor. He grabbed it and furiously drank a few long sips, the hot drink helping him calm down. 

‘John’

‘Don’t John me. You are the kind one. That asshole wasn’t kind’ Johnny hissed again. 

‘He was. Till it benefitted him’ Johnny quickly turned around to face Gheorghe again, feeling first slightly embarrassed for having jumped the gun as usual, before feeling again the surge of anger in his chest at that sentence. 

He could almost picture it. Andrei seducing young Gheorghe with all his sparkling company and taking what wasn’t his to take, before disappearing. 

Johnny couldn’t speak. He shook his head, hoping Gheorghe would understand he didn’t want to hear anymore, but it didn’t seem to stop his partner. 

‘He was very kind to my father too. He showed himself to be the best worker one could want, one his only son liked too. Later, once he disappeared a little before we sold the farm, I understood what he wanted: his plan all along must have been to try and become my father’s partner. Once things started to go bad, he smelled the air had changed and left. Right when my father’s drinking problems started’ 

Right when Gheorghe would have needed help the most, Johnny thought, clenching his fists.

‘He didn’t answer any calls and never returned any messages left with his parents. Soon, I got the message and realised I had to let it go. I learnt that people sometimes abandon you when you least expect it. Accept it and move on, no?’

For a moment, Johnny wished the ground under his feet would open and swallow his whole. He had betrayed Gheorghe’s trust too. 

‘But then I was proven wrong. Not everybody leaves’ Gheorghe said, finally successfully grabbing Johnny’s hand. Johnny smiled to himself. Gheorghe knew him so well he had figured out exactly that he was thinking about the incident at the pub. 

‘Well, they might stay, or come back in certain cases, but I’m not sure they are worth the effort’ 

‘They are’ Gheorghe replied, squeezing his hand. 

Johnny didn’t reply but turned his hand around to interlace their fingers together. 

‘Look, our flight is called’ Gheorghe said after a little while, standing up. 

Johnny stood up too but, before following him to the right gate, he gave one last glimpse to the family with the young kids playing around and one of the two chaps resting his head on his partner’s shoulder. 

One dangerous thought appeared bring as day in his mind:

I want that too. And I would be damned if I am not going to have that.

‘Coming John?’

‘Yes’ 

The journey back was uneventful, except for the landing, much rougher than the other one, due to the heavy wind back home. 

‘Are we still alive?’ Johnny asked, when the plane stopped moving. He could still feel his heart racing in excitement from when the plane flew through thick clouds illuminated by lightning. 

‘Well, I hope so. If there is some afterlife, it would be pretty rubbish for it to be a low-cost airplane’ 

‘Or maybe that is just what hell is like, plus lots of screaming toddlers’ 

‘And with constant adverts about products you can buy’ 

‘God, the horror’ Johnny replied, laughing as they disembarked. 

Johnny had to admit that he really struggled to stay awake on the train journey back, but the freezing air when they got out of the train and into a taxi woke him up like a good slap in the face.  
As the driver turned the car on and left the train station, Johnny tried to watch Gheorghe’s face from the corner of his eye. Was the “good sadness” settling in? Johnny frowned in confusion when, instead of the distant expression he had learnt to recognise, he saw Gheorghe smiling as he relaxed on the back seat of the taxi. 

‘It’s good to be back’ Gheorghe whispered. 

‘Yes’ 

They tried to be as quiet as possible as they stepped in the house, but it was all for nothing. Deirdre, who had fallen asleep in the living room, awoke immediately. 

‘Did you have a good journey?’ she asked, as she pushed aside the tartan cover she had wrapped herself in. 

‘Yes nan, not bad’ Johnny replied, through the surprised feeling in his chest. When was the last time his nan had waited for him like that?

‘Good’ she replied, taking their coats and putting them away. 

‘How is dad?’ 

‘Same as usual’ 

Well, no news, good news, right?

‘There is some dinner waiting for you. Have something to eat and then straight to bed. It’s late’

‘Yes nan’ 

‘Oh, Deirdre’ Gheorghe called. She turned around halfway up the stairs. 

‘From my grandmother. My mother translated it’ Gheorghe said, taking a little envelope out of his pocket. 

‘Your mother?’ Johnny asked, surprised. 

‘She wanted it to be fair. If you couldn’t hear Deirdre’s one, I could read hers’ 

‘Fair’ Deirdre replied, taking the letter and quickly turning around. 

‘Good night boys’ 

‘Night’ 

After a quick dinner, they made their way to their room. Johnny let himself fall on the bed. 

‘Ah, very nice’ he said out loud, stretching his arms under the pillow. He really needed to get up and change into his pyjama, but that could wait a minute or two.  
He opened his eyes only to see Gheorghe fuffing around with something in their sock drawer. 

‘If you are hoping for a pair of matching ones, you might be disappointed’ he said. Bless his nan, she had tried to tell Johnny to help her with the sock matching situation, but it had proven impossible and she had given up. 

‘Do you still want to marry me, yes?’ Gheorghe said. 

Alarm bells rang full blast in Johnny’s mind. He sat up immediately but, unfortunately, from his position he couldn’t really see Gheorghe’s face. 

‘Of course’ What a question was that. 

Johnny clenched his fists to his knees, managing to keep his thoughts, already whirling around his head at full speed, at bay. He needed to keep his head clear for this, whatever this was. 

‘I am glad to hear that’ Gheorghe replied, sitting next to him on the bed. 

‘Are you’ having second thoughts? Johnny wanted to say, but his voice died when Johnny saw the little jewellery box in Gheorghe’s hands. In the dim light of the lamp Gheorghe had insisted on having on his bedside table, the box looked old, the dark blue colour had faced in places and there were some threads sticking out. Johnny lifted his gaze from the box to Gheorghe, who was smiling nervously at him before saying:

‘I wanted to propose properly. I wanted to do it right, maybe after the citizenship ceremony or something special, instead I rushed through it when we got the confirmation letter’ 

It was perfect, Johnny wanted to say, but his mind was suddenly completely blank, and his ears and cheeks felt so warm he feared he was going to explode. 

‘So, I never had the time to give you this’ he said, patting the little box. 

‘But now that you know, now that you have seen my life before meeting you, it’s time for you to have this. 

Gheorghe opened the box to reveal a beautiful, simple, golden ring. 

‘It was my grandfather’s’ he said, quietly. Johnny’s first thought was “perfect”. He wanted to have a wedding ring, but he was never going to opt for something with weird patterns or decorations. But, for as much as he wanted Gheorghe to slip it on his finger, there was something he needed to say. 

Keeping his eyes down to the floor, too embarrassed to do otherwise. Johnny put his hand on Gheorghe’s hands, stopping him from opening the little box.  
Gheorghe was frowning, he was sure of it, but Johnny couldn’t meet his eyes as he said:

‘I might have seen parts of your life I didn’t know before, but there are somethings of me you don’t know’ 

Silence. Ever patient Gheorghe was just keeping quiet for him to find his damn words. But where was he going to start? His fingers were shaking, so Gheorghe patiently put the box away and took Johnny’s hands in his warmer ones. 

Somehow that kindness made him feel even worse. 

But, if there was a good use of his anger, there it was: cut to the chase. 

He took one deep breath before saying:

‘I have never been in love with anyone else before you’ 

He lifted his gaze up, finally meeting Gheorghe’s eyes. Johnny had hardened his heart up, ready to find stupid, annoying pity for the unloved and unloving boy that never felt accepted. But there hadn’t been anybody before Gheorghe patient enough to show him how to do it. He had always thought that it had been a fault on his part, that he had come out from the baby making factory already broken, but that didn’t make sense anymore. How was it his fault if his mother left him without a word? How was it his fault his father never bothered to come and check on him the times he took his teddy and hid in his wardrobe, hoping to find a secret happy place? How was it his fault if none of the countless warm bodies he had sex with had made him feel alive?

But there was no pity in Gheorghe’s eyes. They were warm as usual, with a gentle smile shing in them. 

‘I need to thank you once again then’ 

‘For what?’ 

‘For having trusted me enough to fall in love with me’ 

Johnny gave him a shove. 

‘Sappy idiot’ 

‘Freak’ 

‘Whatever’ Johnny replied, before pushing Gheorghe down on the bed and kissing him soundly.


End file.
